


Ur So F**king cOoL

by adriiadventures



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Explicit Sexual Content, F/F, First Time, Friends to Lovers, Oral Sex, Pining, Vaginal Fingering, both jes and beau are nervous wrecks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-23
Updated: 2020-07-23
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:40:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,975
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25456348
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/adriiadventures/pseuds/adriiadventures
Summary: Beau watches Jester fix the Ball Eater’s hull after escaping the dragon turtle. Is it really so wrong to want to be a ship?Or, Beau breaks her toe while fumbling around. Jester comes to her rescue.
Relationships: Jester Lavorre/Beauregard Lionett
Comments: 8
Kudos: 105





	Ur So F**king cOoL

**Author's Note:**

> I haven’t written fic in 500 years, please be gentle. It’s a slow burn for a bit...and then my first attempt at proper porn. I hope you enjoy this close third POV trailing Beau’s massive crush during what episode 100 was like in my dreams.

Beau has decided that Marius LePual is a terribly incompetent boatswain. As the temporary first mate of the Ball Eater, she was obligated to take over for him, right? She couldn’t just let the god-awful-excuse-for-a-half-elf-tramp-sailor-person be in charge of getting the very necessary, very important supplies for the hull repair. Beau had to do it herself.

It was only a bonus, really, that Beau got to watch Jester at work—in between finding spare parts in boxes below deck, of course. Boy, how she enjoyed watching Jester work. 

For all the crap Beau gave the crew, her favorite person had to be Gallan Westman. Gods bless Gallan for somehow capturing Jester’s attention long enough to teach her how to fix the ship. Jester was the most suited to carpentry, aside from Yasha, who’d rather be above decks, swept up in the wind and sea salt. Jester looked pretty cute swaying on the ship, bugging anyone with a free second to reenact the pose on the mast from that one play.

Anyways, Beau knew the little blue tiefling was strong, arguably stronger than her, despite never working out. Maybe Jester did find time to practice using her axe? She did carve those dick statues of the Traveler, which could take strength, although her dexterous fingers were probably more useful for that. Her long, graceful, always moving fingers. Fingers that would look delicious—well, for Beau, after getting tattoos with her and Nott, Jester’s finer features somehow tended to shine just a little more. 

As Beau marched up and down the stairs, checking in every five or so minutes on their progress, she realized she might have a problem. She had lost time staring at Jester’s nimble hands, the strong pulse of her biceps, the cute tip-toe raise as she reached for the higher parts of the hull... Yes. Yep, she had a really, really big problem. There was no way that Nott—no, there was no way that Veth was right. She didn’t have something as stupid as a _crush_ on _Jester Lavorre_. Innocent, sweet, virginal Jester. Who at that very moment decided to stop providing Beau with a shiny muscle show and settled herself on the floor, fluffing out her skirt beneath her. 

Jester began to sip a small canteen of water and her stomach let out a low grumble. Blushing, Jester looked up to see if anyone had heard. To her surprise, Beau was still there. Despite having already gotten all the wrenches and nails and loose planks and, well, anything her and Gallan could possibly need to fix the ship.

Motivated by her embarrassment and prolonged eye contact, Jester spoke up, “Oh, Beau! Have you come to save me? I’m staaarving. Do we have any doughnuts? Cookies? Scones?” 

“Uh. I...No, I just came to see how repairs were going. And I don’t think so. Don’t you have any in your bag?” Beau responded, unwilling to admit she had been lurking for the last hour. 

“No! We’ve been at sea for so long, I might have kind of eaten some or all of them during the negotiations maybe.”

Beau only cocked one eyebrow in response, a practiced seduction technique that she was, for some reason, using on one of her best friends. She was being sassy—nothing more, nothing less. 

“I can see what Caduceus is cooking up, if you want?” Beau started to head up the stairs, assuming the answer was a firm yes. 

Jester stood up and brushed down her skirts. “Mm, no, that’s okay!” Beau paused on the stairs. “I’ll just wait for dinner. Since Gallan’s on his break...” She pointed a thumb towards the now snoring man in the corner. When the hell had he taken a break? Jester picked up her sentence, “...you can stay and help!”

If Beau didn’t know any better, she might have mistaken the smirk on Jester’s face as something more devious. Jester was known for her antics, and flirted endlessly with, well, everyone. It was probably unintentional, she was just that charming. 

Beau tripped back down the stairs, yelping as she slammed into the side railing and her foot caught on the step. “Fuck! Shit!” Falling face forward, Beau managed to catch herself with her arms, but her foot was a goner. 

Concerned, like the angel she is, Jester ran over to Beau’s side. Beau grasped onto Jester’s arm for dear life as she hobbled about, holding her foot in the other hand. Jester maneuvered Beau onto the floor and started taking off her boots.

“How bad does it hurt?” Jester began peeling off Beau’s sock, quickly working her fingers down her heel, arch, sole, and little toes, until she spotted the bleeding offender. “I’m going to get you some therapy lotion and a bandage, hold on.”

As Jester turned around, Beau snapped her hand out, grasping at Jester’s wrist. “Nah, Jes, I’m fine.” Her voice came out more craggly than expected. She coughed a little and resumed, “Really, we just fought a fucking giant turtle. It’s just a stubbed toe.” Beau gave Jester her best reassuring smile, which she hoped wasn’t too scary.

“Beau, you’re _bleeding_. I know it’s just a toe, but we’re at sea! People lose their limbs at sea!” Jester flailed her arms dramatically, pretending to saw off her own arm.

Beau let out a pity laugh at her antics. “I’m pretty sure no pirate gained their peg-leg from tripping down the stairs like an idiot.”

“You’re not an idiot. Stop saying stuff like that. You don’t have to be so strong, Beau.”

“Jes, I…” Beau absolutely has and will never cry over a jammed toe. It wasn’t really the pulsing pain in her extremities that was moving her to tears; it was the pulsing euphoria in her cold ass heart that the Mighty Nein was prying open with every passing day. The permission they gave her to be soft, caring, gentle—the warmth Jester engenders and encourages. “I’m fine, Jester. Help me up and I’ll let you treat my ‘wound,’ I guess.” 

Without a word, Jester guided Beau into their room, smiling brighter than the sun. She settled Beau into the bed, feet up on a pillow.

“Do you feel like it’s broken?” Jester asked as she rested on a chair at the edge of the bed, inspecting Beau’s foot. 

“I don’t think so. I’ve broken a lot of bones before, doesn't feel like that,” she replied.

“Well, it’s your toe, though. It feels a little crooked, Beau.” With that, Jester gave Beau’s injured toe a little pinch. A squeeze. A tap that somehow elicited a hearty scream out of Beau. “Yep, broken. Do you mind if I set it?” 

Beau almost asked Jester to get Caduceus instead. _I’m such a fucking dick_. Why would she need Caduceus Clay when the perfectly capable cleric Jester Lavorre was in front of her?

“Okay. Am I supposed to do anything to help?” she asked.

Jester looked around the room and grabbed a clean undershirt, handing it to Beau. “Yeah, bite on this.” 

Beauregard Lionett has slept with many, many women. She’s been on the other side of this situation plenty of times—partners gagged and bound in front of her. Jester was setting her disgusting broken toe, not getting ready to fuck the living daylights out of her body. Reluctantly, needily, distractedly, Beau put the Jester-smelling shirt in her mouth and bit down. 

“Okay, Beau, on the count of three. One, two,” and Jester snapped her toe into place, fake warning out of the way.

Beau winced and spit out the shirt, “You said fucking three!”

“Did I? Oops.” Jester’s eyes sparkled, purple irises dancing mischievously.

Beau feigned the victim, clutching her hand to her chest dramatically. “How dare you deceive me on purpose, Jester Magnolia Lavorre.”

“You think my middle name is Magnolia?” Jester giggled, enjoying seeing the rare goofy side to Beau.

“Could be.” Beau leaned forward haughtily.

Jester matched Beau’s pose, getting up in her face. “Could be. Or it could be something else. What’s yours?” She squinted, hoping to get answers from the usually unreadable expression.

The way Jester’s eyes pierced her soul made Beau wish she had a better answer than the truth. “I don’t have one.”

“Okay.”

Jester’s eyes had hypnotized her. There was no other explanation for why Beau’s hand dragged up to brush a wisp of hair out of Jester’s eyes. She just wanted to see her better—more. Jester’s gaze followed Beau’s hand, which was now affixed in her hair.

They stayed like that for a moment, until Jester placed her hand over Beau’s. 

“Jes...?” Beau asked.

“Yeeees?” Jester giggled, leaning into Beau’s face. Beau’s eyes lit up into the widest circles Jester had ever seen, as Jester rested their foreheads together. “Hi, Beau.” Jester batted her lashes slowly, tempting Beau, who absolutely could not fucking taking it anymore. 

She had been staring and wanting all day, and here Jester was, practically in her lap. Beau shifted the hand in Jester’s hair towards the back of her head and pulled her close. Beau’s brain shut off at the taste of Jester’s mouth, like a honey and caramel glaze. Jester let out a little gasp, almost inaudible, almost like her perpetual hiccups after eating spicy food. Beau moaned, having the presence of mind to break the kiss.

“Are you—was that—is this okay?” Beau panted, wanting more but wanting Jester’s enthusiastic yes first. 

“I...I’ve never read about two women before, I’m not really sure what to do, and I liked that very much, and I would like to do more, and your ponytail is a little messed up now and—” Jester rambled, wringing her hands and blushing a deep scarlet.

Beau leaned forward and drew her in for another deep kiss, wanting to abate her sea of anxiety. Jester, the daughter of the Ruby of the Sea, was nervous about kissing Beauregard Lionett. Beau didn’t want to be _that guy_ , but saying Jester’s relative innocence was unappealing would be an utter lie. And Jester was the only person she never wanted to lie to. 

“Jes, Jes.” Beau stopped again, and Jes whimpered. She hadn’t gotten an answer and needed to know Jester was all in, like she was from the moment they met. “Jes. You’re okay with this, right? I’m...I don’t want to push you. We don’t have to do anything. I like just _looking_ at you.” She was determined not to fuck this up. This one spectacular, amazing miracle.

Jester bit her lip and leaned back on her heels, somehow having been dragged onto Beau’s lap during one of their many kisses. “Well, I’m glad you finally said it. I kind of picked up on that after the first hour you spent staring at me repair the hull, Beau.”

“I-I did _not_ _—_ ” Beau stammered as Jester gave her The Look. “Okay. I might have.” Jester moved nose-to-nose with Beau. “I definitely did.” 

“Yes, you did.” This time, Jester was on the offensive, attempting to suck Beau’s soul out of her mouth. She was no stranger to sex, really, but it was her first time experimenting with another living, breathing body. Let alone the body of her nightly cuddle buddy, her roommate, her party member, her incredibly fit, muscley monk next door, her…Just her. Just Beau.

A devilish idea in mind, Jester leaned back, and Beau whined low and deep. She didn’t know she would like baiting Beau so much. Jester slowly stood up, facing away from Beau as she kicked off her shoes and socks, then played with the hem of her skirt, bent over. 

“Like what you see?” Jester continued to pull up her dress as she stood up straight, turning to face Beau as her breasts popped out of the cups. The dress was rapidly thrown towards the door with a soft thud as Beau scrambled off the bed in a mad dash. 

“I _love_ what I see. Now let me make you feel good.” Beau tossed Jester onto their small twin bed with ease. Between Jester’s naturally splayed out legs, Beau began to strip quickly, focused on the task at hand more than teasing Jester like she had her. The way Jes bit her lip once she was fully naked, though, was more than rewarding. 

Beau’s own first time had been not only messy, but mostly drunk. That’s how she liked to spend a lot of her time: out of it. But for Jester, she wanted to imprint every second into the back of her brain. Beau started with small kisses around Jester’s face, eventually moving to nip at her ears. 

She muttered sweet nothings endlessly on loop between sucking, licking, and biting into the nook of Jester’s shoulder. Her hands kept pace with her mouth, alternating between trailing slow circles around Jester’s areolas and mimicking the soft tugs and plucks she was making on her ears and neck. 

“Oh! Ohhh,” Jester’s back arched with a mix of pleasure and surprise. It felt different than doing it on her own, when Beau was out in someone else’s bed. Now Beau was here, with her, making her dizzier than the craziest prank. 

Beau lifted up from Jester’s body, leaving an ache in the space. “Beauuuu, noo—” Jester began to protest, until Beau’s mouth began nibbling at her thighs. 

“Touch your nipples for me, Jes. Show me what you like.” Beau crooned from between her thighs, encouraging Jester to ride the pleasure train. Jester took far too long to process the request, causing Beau to nip just a little harder. Surprisingly, Jester only moaned. She would save that information for later. “Hands, Jes, hands.”

Jester complied, her thighs trembling at the added sensory pleasure. Beau began massaging the back of Jester’s thighs, working the tension and nervousness out of her body as she began to lick her way into the curly blue bush. As Jester’s lower half went limp, her arch seizing, Beau moved her hands and spread the unbelievable angel in front of her open. She gave a testing lick, and looked up for Jester’s reaction—and was met with closed eyes.

“Open your eyes, Jes.” Jester only mustered a moan and flick of her eyes. As they locked eyes, Beau began her exploration of Jester’s dripping pussy. Much like her mouth, she tasted sweet, but smelled even better than expected. She tested different strokes and thrusts around her clit and in her pussy, discovering Jester’s varied reactions. Beau found Jester’s high-pitched squeak and thrust into her nose the most exciting one, wishing she had a free hand to play with Jester’s cute, puckered hole.

Jester’s breathing quickened and Beau felt a rush of excitement. Pride? Narcissism at her own skill? She added a third finger into Jester’s very tight opening, curling upwards in an attempt to bring her even closer to orgasm. Jester’s thighs suddenly smushed Beau’s head, forcing her in place and cutting off most of her hope and drawing new breaths, but she didn’t need air when she had Jester. Beau kept lapping, taking her other hand off of Jester’s clit and onto her ass, leaving red scratches. 

“Cum for me, Jes.” The second Beau released Jester’s clit from her mouth, she exploded. The sheer need of Beau’s mouth made her _want_. Beau latched back onto her favorite pussy, hoping to get Jester to a second orgasm quickly after. Jester’s fluttering, somewhat violent thighs relaxed eventually, revealing the sight of post-orgasm Jester to Beau. Her tightly clenched hands in fists and heaving chest sparkled with sweat, emphasizing her beautiful chubby curves. If Beau was more open with her feelings, she might even say she was in love. 

The sound of heavy breathing eventually made its way into Jester’s peripheral senses as she lay spent on the bed. After a moment, Jester stood up, tired but determined. “Your turn. Lay down, pleaaase.”

Beau smiled widely, unsurprised by Jester’s giving nature. “Next time, Jes. Today was about you.” 

Jester flopped back down onto the bed defeatedly. “Hmmmph. Fine. I’ll get you back good, though.”  
  
Beau laughed, happy with the enthusiasm. “Promise?” 

Beau maneuvered Jester on top of her, fixing them into a tight cuddling position. She began tracing circles into the back of Jester’s head, entranced with the natural blue. She meandered to a horn, petting at its base, eliciting an almost pained moan from the little tiefling. “Oh? Did that feel good?”

“Too good, Beau.” Jester used the last of her body strength to lift her body up and next to Beau, shoulder to shoulder in the cramped bed. “I’ll tell you about all the naughty things horns are capable of next time. Can we sleep?” Beau’s mouth lost function, wishing next time was now. 

Jester sealed the pause with a soft kiss, taking the opportunity for one sweet bite before a well deserved nap. Beau’s inherent shoulder tension relaxed at Jester’s touch, and began to make them comfortable, making more space for them both and laying Jester’s arm over her waist. 

As she settled into bed, finally closing her eyes, Caduceus motherfucking Clay opened the door, without knocking, but with good intentions. “Hey Beau, how’s your foo—” His mouth opened and closed, his brain working furiously to connect the context clues of what was going on. 

While Jester was a teensy weensy bit embarrassed, they had all seen each other naked at the baths, and so she just snuggled into Beau’s side. For both women, it was easier to ignore the looming threat of endless teasing. Veth’s “I told you so” loomed in Beau’s head as she reached behind her head to chuck a pillow at him, a very clear signal to get out. 

“Yup, nevermind.” Cad slowly backed out of the room, leaving the two love birds in peace. For now.


End file.
